I’m wondering if you can still meet people in 2015 and have a physical, emotional, and spiritual bond, besides the digital.
I’ve been in four back-to-back long-term relationships.
So, on top of feeling like an orphan teenager in this adult world, I’m also trying to understand the rules of texting and social media.
Now, when you talk about someone else with your friends, you pull up their Instagram.
People get a sense of who you are before you even meet them.
Vashtie Kola, a DJ, director, artist, and designer, released her own music video this week for Drake’s “Hotline Bling.” Inspired by Drake’s lyrics about coping with a breakup in a digital age, Vashtie created a character based off of her own experiences late night scrolling through an ex’s Instagram and the challenges of meeting new people.
Here, she opens up about social media rules, from un-following your ex to sliding into DMs.How would you describe your relationship with social media?I’m single now for the first time since I was fifteen.It’s the last thing you need during your lowest moments, maybe when you’ve been drinking and you’re really bummed and you’re scrolling and you don’t want to accidentally like something…The way that I cope with it is trying to make amends on my own. You have to make amends with it internally before you can interact with social media. It seems trivial, but the un-follow can really hurt.It’s literally like in the Wild Wild West when cowboys would walk three steps and turn to draw and then shoot. But it’s part of the process, especially if it didn’t end well. I have periods where I literally do go on airplane mode. Sometimes one person will un-follow and then the other person will just to prove that they don’t care either. I don’t even watch cooking shows because it’s too frustrating that I can’t taste it. I know this is such a rare thing, but I have a landline, so sometimes I tell people for a weekend, “Hey, if you need to get in touch with me, call me on my landline because I’m turning my phone off.” I also try to do 20 minutes a day of transcendental meditation.